Good Bye, For Now

This and my other blogging experiments all started when I realized the magnitude of the world predicaments about five years ago (it seems like it has been much more time, isn’t it?)

12 years ago today (June 20, summer’s solstice) my family and I came to Canada, with the illusion to build a new, prosperous life for all of us, specially our children.

10763_10152150953813898_1065002141_n

Nothing would we know (me, in particular) that coming so far away from where I was born, would bring me so close to “home”. Nothing would I know that Canada would give me a return to the real inside of me, to the things and concepts I most value…

While I have always preferred solitude and exploration to social life and mainstream thinking, nothing has been rockier than these last five years since a book and some circumstances took the veil covering my naive eyes and showed me the reality behind my colonized mind.

My first reaction was that of anger, mixed with fear and anxiety and a call for action, I participated in protests and proactively sought to be with like-minded people.


183924_10151199079648898_14076353_n

Parallel to this, I took permaculture courses, attended old-ways-skills workshops and deepened my already existent passion for survivalism and self-reliance. I engaged in social justice through food sovereignty and emergency preparedness teaching, I tried to transform my own life to live closer to my newly recovered values…

10888467_10152894559688898_1085729851145446706_n

All those “adventures” have been shared through this and my other blogs and have not been hidden from family, friends of colleagues at work: my transformation (homecoming) was open for all to see and helped others to rethink, awake and transform their own ways.

1544563_10152280458493898_4726687944167184628_n

Behind the scenes and during all my life, however, I have been building this tower of resilience and strength. I have also been running away from painful events and people in my early years, ignoring patterns that were sown and marked long time ago. I thought compassion (this mix of acceptance, love and service) would be enough, I thought “going in” was a waste of time, a sort of selfish navel gazing that would accomplish nothing.

It has been a surprise to me how deep and persistent certain patterns, emotions and wounds be buried. Just to resurface through an innocent picture, a gesture or an email trying to help someone else.

I’m leaving this and the other blogs for now…it may be days, weeks, months or even years.

It is time to explore other shores…to see what’s next and whether these exercises (of writing) still make sense…I may come up with a new blog, or revamp one of these, or close the experience entirely.

1625649_10152813368068898_9214338548207671676_n

I wish you all (who have been following, reading or visiting occasionally) the best.  Enjoy the present moment but don’t fool yourself thinking it is the only thing that exists: we are the result of the past and the expectation from the future. Look at the sacred in life, embrace that other, but start with yourself: others may come and go, may be many or a few, but you will be always there, and at the end of the day, ego or not, “yourself” is the only thing you have.

Namaste: I salute the divine in all of you

10 thoughts on “Good Bye, For Now

  1. yay you have done so much amazing work

    i would love to see a free downloadable PDF book of the best of what you have put together – not required, just a thought to celebrate the amazing work you have done these past years

    a thousand thousand blessings

    delvin

    >

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are my amazing friend, mentor, teacher and inspiration…[I] will take some time to evaluate my priorities and where I’m of most value and need. As you know, while I love beautiful things, I am too aware of the reality of impermanence…we are here to wake up and celebrate the sacredness of it all, including our pain for the world. Missing you, will see you soon in the Sunshine Coast 🙂

      Like

    1. Thanks David! I will still continue reading other people’s blog, including yours and the comments at Resilience.org…I’m just taking some needed time off. We can’t forget that the first principle is observation, and that we need to start at home, not the other way around 🙂

      Like

  2. I am so grateful we met, dear Silvia, and for the opportunity I had to learn from you. I shall miss your deep, poetic, and thoughtful posts and your powerful presence and insights. I send you love and blessings on your new journeys. ❤

    Like

    1. I won’t disappear Carol. I’m just trying to make sense of it all, the personal and family challenges along with those of the community and the world at large. Find a way to be more helpful beyond sharing my ideas and projects but being also consistent and true to my own values, sharing the challenges so others can lean, while respecting the privacy of those close to me…I hit a wall and now I have a few options in front of me: look around to see whether there is a door, a window or even a small crack; trying to see whether the wall is actually a full wall or it has an end I can go around or look into myself and ask whether I may need to punch it, make a hole and break free…there is another option: to put up with it…or, to decide it doesn’t matter or doesn’t exist, but I’m really bad with denial 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s